I truly understand that family law matters present an array of challenges that can persist outside of the courtroom.

Divorce Does Not Have to be Devastating

There are a lot of resources that can help people to communicate more effectively.  Mediators can assist with this, by providing a neutral third person to guide the interactions.  Lawyers can help, by looking for the common ground between the parties rather than looking for things to argue about.

There are a variety of conflict styles, and they can affect the type of resolution achieved.

Examples of these styles include:

Giving In

Allowing the other party to have what they want. This certainly ends the conflict, but it can also lead to resentment on the part of the person who is giving in, and it also leads to an unbalanced outcome as only one person’s needs/wants are being addressed.

Avoiding Reality

Withdrawing completely and refusing to address the situation, often done out of fear or an unwillingness to face the facts of a bad situation.  This method causes serious delay in resolution and can lead to a resolution that is imposed on you by the Court.

Compromising

Done in an effort to balance your own needs with the needs of the other person, an effort to work through differences and find common ground.

Know Your Options

Mediation IF:

  • Each party is able to speak up for themselves.
  • Both parties are motivated to resolve things amicably.
  • Parties are able and willing to be respectful towards each other.
  • Parties want control over outcome but willing to compromise.

Negotiation and Possible Litigation IF:

  • There are domestic violence issues or a significant power imbalance
  • There are impediments to amicable resolution, e.g. desire for revenge
  • There is a high degree of conflict and/or disrespect
  • Compromise is unlikely or issue does not lend itself to compromise